"Attack of the Full-Moon Fiend" (Chapter 2) Original Fanfic by Wesley Reece, MSTing by Alan / I.N.T.O. (I'm Not The Otaking) E-Mail: For disclaimers, please see the end of this file. On the Satellite of Love's bridge, Mike, Crow, and Tom Servo are seated at three computers. All of them are wearing large red helmets that cover their whole heads. In the background, Gypsy is maneuvering the ship. In short, it would be a typical day on the old satellite... But deeply engrossed in the IRC channel #msting, Mike and the bots are avidly chatting... in 3-d mode. With their interesting yet barely described VR helmets, they can actually see the text they are typing in three dimensions! %I dunno,% Tom typed, %but Ive seen fanfics worse than this one. I mean this doesnt hold a candel to artemis lover or enterprized.% Laughing quietly, Mike responded, %it's hard to classify badness. by that i mean some people probably liked Minako Warrior Princess Sidekick and obviously the author did, but when has any semiserious crossover been good?% %well... i liked Dirty moon,% mentioned Crow, bobbing his head up and down, %it WAS supposed to be funny... especially that melvin part. yeah it was dumb too... like the pointless scene with mihoshi... but its lots better than ACL. what do you think?% he asked of his fellow IRC companions. Mike, not terribly interested in all of this, replied with, %yeah. not all the MSTIngs we do are of bad stuff, and i think it should saty that way.% He was just about to log off when a new user entered the channel. %Dont you *LOVE* 3d text?????% the mysterious individual, who tagged himself as "docf," asked, %I do I do I do. so much that I am sending you BACK in2 that THEATER to see MORE of the FANFIC!!!!!!!% Sighing, Tom typed, %yes, doctor forrester.% Taking off his VR device, Mike could finally hear the fanfic sign going off. He took the bots' helmets off, and said loudly, "Oh, we got fanfic sign!" Without a moment more of complaining, the three went into the theater, sat down, and waited... -- > <<<<<>>>>> TOM: Just our luck. He switches from NA to original just like that... What's next? Renaming the Outers? > starring in > Attack of the Full-Moon Fiend, Part 2 > The Sailor Senshi's Last Stand? > a piece of Fan Fiction > Written by Wesley Reece > a.k.a. Bowser_DaHound or Bad Boy Bowser >LEGAL STUFF: If you read Part 1, you know all the necessary copyright >information. Just forget this part and get to the story. MIKE: We're *trying* to forget it. >PROLOGUE: by Bad Boy Bowser d::-) >-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= > I don't have much to say here that I didn't say before Part 1. >I just hope that you will enjoy this story, the second in the three >part Full-Moon Fiend series. >-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= > >(FADE IN: INT., NEGAVERSE SKYBASE OVER TOKYO) > >(We see Rubeus and Catsy sitting on two of the pedestals. Absent >from the scene are Birdie, Avery, and Prisma.) CROW: ...Who are missing from the scene for *what* reason? I sense lemon! MIKE: This is coming from the bot who made dirty jokes through "My Neighbor Totoro," "Kiki's Delivery Service," and EVEN "Grave of the Fireflies." >Rubeus: (to Catsy) I'm sure glad we decided to give those sisters of >your's a day off so that they could go shopping. TOM: (Catsy) I like shopping... Must give little bills into others' hands... >Catsy: Yes, I haven't seen any action since we first got here. What >do you say you pick a Crystal Point at random, and let me go conquer >it? >Rubeus: Capital idea! How do you propose we pick this point? >Catsy: (produces a 10-sided die) Use this. I've seen people play >games with things like this. CROW: (Catsy as a gamemaster) So, basically, you roll 3d10, total up the numbers on the left column of your character sheet, multiply the third by seven... >Just attach numbers 1-5 to the points. You roll a number, I'll >divide it by 2, and round to the nearest whole number. The point >with the number that results is the one we'll go after. (Displays >the face marked 0) This face translates into 10. >Rubeus: (Nods his head) Sounds good to me. (Takes the die from >Catsy as the Crystal Map appears in the center of the base. He >shakes the die and rolls a 7.) >Catsy: (Does some mental calculations) Okay, that equates into 4. TOM: What sort of screwed-up math is that?? (His head begins smoking.) CROW: You know, I didn't make that gamemastering reference for nothing. Don't worry about details! >Show us Crystal Point number 4. (The map reveals that said point is >at a flea market.) Excellent. Now, what monster shall we use to >take over this point? MIKE: The shopping youma! The *lumberjack* youma! TOM: Wrong continuity, Mike. MIKE: Yeah, but it's fun! >Rubeus: Leave that to me. (Touches two fingers to the moon in his >forehead.) I summon the services of Adrian Atkinson! (A black fan >with a full moon on it pierces the ground. It vanishes, and a young >man appears in its place. He is moderately tall, somewhat hefty, and >wears glasses.) CROW: We... have... description. Impressive. >Catsy: (Scoffing) THIS is your Adrian? You can't be serious! Eep! >(She face-faults as Adrian suddenly charges her. He grabs her left >arm with his left hand, spins around, grabs the back of her head with >his right hand, and tosses her to the ground.) TOM: (Adrian) *Nobody* insults a self-insertion! >Rubeus: (Chuckling softly to himself.) You shouldn't have taken him >lightly. That really sets him off. Plus, there is more to him. >(Turns to Adrian.) >Adrian: (Strikes a pose) I am also known as the Full-Moon Fiend where >I come from. You saw my entrance. Just say that I'm gonna be able >to kick butt and take names, and I'll be happy. >Catsy: We hope that you will. >Adrian: (Jumps into the air.) YES!!! MIKE: Adrian's competing with Ash from "Pokemon" in the hyperactivity department. TOM: Prozac does wonders for anime characters... >Rubeus: (Points to the Crystal Map) And this is the backdrop. >Adrian: (Recognizes the location) Hey, I've got a booth there! We can >work out of it! >Catsy: Well, let's go then. (Catsy and Adrian step through the >mirror with the flea market's image.) > >(ORB SCENE SHIFT: INT., FLEA MARKET, A COVERED BOOTH) > >(Catsy and Adrian appear in front of a covered outside booth.) > >Adrian: This is my booth. I sell all sorts of stuff here. CROW: God, he's just like Amy! Saying only the obvious, kicking the shit out of everyone... So why don't I like him? >(His watch beeps. He looks at it and face-faults as a giant sweat >drop forms.) Oh, no! I was supposed to meet someone here. Catsy, >you work the booth. TOM: (Catsy) But I'm not that kind of girl! MIKE: Tom... >Catsy: Sure thing. (She begins setting up shop as Adrian bolts.) > >(TIARA SCENE SHIFT: EXT., FLEA MARKET, SIDE ENTRANCE) > >(We see Raye and Amy standing outside a side door, talking.) > >Raye: Are you sure this is the place that he told us to be? >Amy: Absolutely. He said to be at the side entrance. TOM: Once was bad enough. Why does this author have to describe his scenes *both* in narration and in the dialogue?? MIKE: I guess that's what you do in self-insertion. CROW: Besides screwing random people. >Serena: (Approaching the group) Hey, have any of you seen Luna and >Artemis yet? >Raye: I think they went with Mina and Lita to meet up with Rini and >Darian. >Ami: (Looking off towards the side) Speaking of which, here they come >now. (Cut to show the others running towards the group at a steady >clip, all panting heavily.) MIKE: (Darien) Jeez... Rini... I told you... not to try to... out-run A-Ko... >Luna: Hello there, (huff, puff)... >Artemis: (pant, pant) Sorry we're late. >Darian: We missed the bus and had to walk (pant, wheeze). (The four >latecomers stop beside the first three and catch their breath.) >Rini: Yeah. Usually, it's Serena who's late. (Pulls a face.) >Serena: (Pulls one back) Well, that was NOT the case today! CROW: (police officer) Domestic violence in third precinct involving meatball-head girl and pink-haired girl. >Mina: (Looks around) Hey, where's Adrian? (Raye, Amy, and Serena >shrug their shoulders.) >Lita: It's not like a person to invite you some place, then show up >late. >Adrian: (Bursts outside via the side entrance.) Hi, gang. Sorry I'm >late. (The entire group eeps as giant sweat drops form on each of >their heads.) TOM: I mean, don't we all sweatdrop after we eep? MIKE: What the hell is an eep? >Serena: (Whirls around.) Don't DO that! >Amy: (Recovering.) I believe an explanation is in order. (Folds her >arms.) >Adrian: Well, I had to set up my booth, and I didn't leave any time >to reach our chosen meeting place. So I had my sister open the booth >while I came to meet you. I didn't mean it. CROW: Catsy isn't *really* his sister, right? TOM: I'm just trying to keep under control here... >Raye: Well, your apology is accepted. Now, let's have some FUN! ALL: Whoa! CROW: (Adrian) You and me and a cat named Artemis. TOM: Crow... >All: RIGHT! (They all turn to enter as Adrian leads the way.) > >(TIARA SCENE SHIFT: INT., FLEA MARKET, NEAR SIDE ENTRANCE) > >(We see Adrian leading the way as they enter.) >Adrian: I'll show you all the places that I like to go. (Walks a few >paces and points to the right.) Their pork rinds RULE... MIKE: (Serena) Oh my God! I just ate P-chan! Burp. TOM: "RULE"? I hope that isn't an acronym or anything... CROW: Maybe it is. "Rini Under Lead Elephants." >Serena:...And they have free samples! (She begins to pig out TOM: (author) I kill me! The puns are gonna keep comin'... >on the Barbeque flavored samples, then realizes her mistake as her >mouth starts burning up.) >Adrian: (Chuckles softly.) Here, Serena. Take some of my water. >(She accepts and takes a big swig. They walk to the next isle before >Adrian points to his right again.) There's a comic store that way. >(They proceed to the next intersection.) This will be our hub. TOM: Does this author know that Japan labels its streets by intersections? CROW: Does it matter? >We will split up and go wherever we want, but we need to be back >here by noon. Agreed? >All: (in unison) Agreed! (Adrian takes Luna and Artemis with him as >they go outside, Mina and Lita head down the isle they are at, while >the others return to places already visited.) > >(ORB SCENE SHIFT: ADRIAN'S BOOTH) > >(Adrian hurriedly dashes behind the booth.) MIKE: (Clark Kent) Must not be seen changing in public... >Catsy: (Sees Adrian in such a rush) What's up? >Adrian: Just leave for a while. I'll call you. Trust me. >Catsy: Okay, then. (She phases out of sight.) > >(TIARA SCENE SHIFT: 10 MINUTES LATER) > >(The girls meet at Adrian's booth.) > >Raye: Hey, Adrian. I'm really glad you invited us here. >Amy: There are so many different shops here. >Lita: Your booth is pretty cool, too. CROW: (Lita) Yeah! I've always wanted a dil-- MIKE & TOM: *Crow*! >Adrian: Thanks. (Sends a telepathic call to Catsy as the girls begin >talking. Suddenly, Catsy pops into view.) >Luna: (From behind the booth) Oh, no! It's a Nega-Trap! >Artemis: Transform, girls! >Girls: Right! >(Triumphant fanfare plays in the background.) MIKE: It's just not the same in a fanfic. >Lita: Jupiter Star Power! >Amy: Mercury Star Power! >Raye: Mars Star Power! >Mina: Venus Star Power >Lita, Amy, Raye, @ Mina: Scout Power! (Transform into their >respective Sailors.) >Serena: Moon Crystal Power! (Changes into Sailor Moon.) >All: (After transforming) We are the Sailor Senshi! TOM: Damn! And right after saying "Scout power"... Oh, crap, I'm losing it... (His head is sparking furiously.) MIKE: Never ask questions, Tom. It's much safer that way. >We stand for love and justice! (Each poses and points at Catsy as >they say their next lines.) >Moon: In the name of the moon, I'll punish you! >Jupiter: In the name of Jupiter, I'm taking you down! >Mars: In the name of Mars, prepare to be burned! >Mercury: In the name of Mercury, you will be terminated! CROW: Mercury is *not* Schwarzenegger! Good God, what was this author thinking? >Venus: In the name of Venus, love WILL prevail! (In the meantime, >Adrian has left the scene, leaving Catsy alone.) >Catsy: Allright, then. Let's go! (They start fighting, but neither >Catsy nor the Sailor Senshi can gain a clear edge. MIKE: Darn it, that sentence makes me think of "A Black Day." TOM: Or "Transformation Sequence." CROW: That bad, huh? >Suddenly, a red rose pierces the ground. Shortly afterward, cut to >Tuxedo Mask, running towards the fight, with Rini close behind him.) >Tuxedo: (to Rini) Hide behind that booth! >Rini: Right! (Joins Luna and Artemis.) >Tuxedo: (Still charging Catsy) You have used this market for evil, >and that can NOT be tolerated! MIKE: (Adrian) It is written, "My booth will be called a house of shopping," but you are making it a "den of monsters." >(He almost reaches Catsy, but is stopped when a black fan with a full >moon on it pierces the ground.) Eep! (The fan vanishes in a puff of >black smoke, leaving a young man in its place. He is wearing a black >jacket, a black motorcycle helmet (with a matching visor), black shirt, >black pants, and black shoes. CROW: Cool. Looks like our self-insertion's a goth! >The only part of his attire that isn't black is a gold moon on top of >his helmet, as well as on both its sides and on both sides of his shirt. >This is the Full-Moon Fiend. He backflips a couple times before >addressing the girls.) > >Fiend: (Strikes a pose.) I am the Full-Moon Fiend! I only have two >purposes in life. One, to eliminate her, (Points to Rini.) MIKE: Yes! We love you, Fiend! TOM: A self-insertion after CURE's own heart. >and two, (Points to Mask and the girls.) to kick your collective rear >ends! >Senshi: (In unison) We don't think so! >Fiend: Oh, but I do! (Wields a staff.) Full Moon Magic! Make me a >cat-o-9-tails! (He tosses the staff into the air, which then >transforms into said weapon. He catches it and holds it over his >head. Suddenly the tails extend and wrap themselves around the Sailor >Senshi, Mask, the cats, and Rini.) TOM: That's not a cat o' nine tails! If he had a *real* one, he'd use it to whip the Sailors. At the end of each tail is supposed to be some object to hurt the victim with. CROW: Well, maybe it's better this way. The Sailors can get into bondage-- MIKE: Crow! >Planar Teleport! (Fiend and his captives vanish. As they do, fade to >black.) > >(FADE IN: AN OPEN FIELD) MIKE: Here we have the grassy knoll where Queen Serenity was shot... > >(The group reappears.) > >Rini: Where are we? >Fiend: I'll tell you this, this isn't Kansas, and those Benalish >Heroes riding in on Mesa Pegasi TOM: What?! Is this the "Stars" series all of a sudden? MIKE: I don't even want to think about what a Benalish Hero is... >aren't Dorothy and her family! >(All look. Cut to four Pegasi landing, each being ridden by a female >warrior.) Cat-o-9-tails, release! (His captives are freed. Fiend >points at Tuxedo Mask, Rini, and the cats.) >Take them away. (He turns around as his orders were being carried >out.) Okay, then. Full Moon Magic. Weapon revert! (His weapon >reverts to its staff form.) Who's first? CROW: (Merury) Me! I wanna go! TOM: Stupid, stupid otaku creatures... >Venus: I'll go first! Take this, you Nega-creep! VENUS LOVE CHAIN, >ENCIRCLE! >Fiend: You MUST be joking! (Grabs one end of the chain and pulls it >away from Sailor Venus. He forms a lasso out of the other end and >throws it, snaring her. He wraps it around her and pulls hard, >causing her to spin like a top. MIKE: In his spare time, Fiend is a cattle rancher! >When she stops, she is quite dizzy. >She falls to the ground as a result. The Full-Moon Fiend twirls his >staff.) Next! >Jupiter: Try this one on for size! JUPITER THUNDERCLAP, ZAP! >Fiend: (Snickers.) Batter up! (He bats the bolt back, TOM: How the hell did he "bat" the bolt-- CROW & MIKE: Not gonna think about it. Not gonna think about it. >hitting her >>right in the stomach. She goes into an X-ray mode and falls to the >ground, still smoking.) What a revolting development THAT was! >(Begins laughing out loud.) >Mars & Mercury: Let's see you handle two at once! (The next two >attacks are performed simultaneously.) >Mars: MARS CELESTIAL FIRE, SURROUND! >Mercury: MERCURY ICE BUBBLES, FREEZE! >Fiend: This is cool, but you can't take the heat. MIKE: Dang, he just keeps getting punnier with every line. Doesn't every "Sailor Moon" villain do this? TOM: All the ones I can remember. >(He sheaths his >staff and holds up his hands, stopping the projectiles as they near. >He sends the fire to Sailor Mercury and the ice to Sailor Mars. As a >result, Mercury is burnt to a crisp, while Mars suffers a DEEP >freeze.) Four down, one to go. >Moon: (Produces her Moon Scepter and starts the motions linked with >its use.) You've bullied my friends, you major league MIKE: Back to the minors for Sailor Moon! >Nega-sleeze, >and for that you will PAY! MOON SCEPTER... >Fiend: (Catches Sailor Moon trying to wield her Moon Scepter.) No, >you don't! (He flips over her head, grabs the scepter, and tosses it >away.) >Moon: (Aside.) Okay, then. On to Plan B. (Aloud.) Let's see you >handle this one so easily, Nega-trash! (Quickly removes her tiara >and throws it.) MOON TIARA MAGIC! (Fiend does a couple backflips, >jumps straight up into the air, and catches the tiara between his legs TOM: Yeeeech! MIKE: I don't want a picture of that... >before landing on both feet.) Hey, no fair! That's supposed to work >every time! >Fiend: That was fun! Now, it's YOUR turn to catch! CROW: Gotta catch 'em all! >(Holds the tiara >like an Olympic discus and throws it sideways, as in vertically >instead of horizontally. Sailor Moon catches it right in the big bow >on her chest. The resulting power surge causes Sailor Moon to fall >to the ground, unconscious. At this point, Rubeus and Catsy phase >into view.) TOM: (Fiend) About time you phase in, guys. I think I was almost about to lose there... >Rubeus: Well done! I knew that you would do the job right! >Fiend: (Bows.) It was my pleasure. >Catsy: (Approaches the unconscious Sailor Senshi.) Now let's finish >'em off! (Fiend blocks her.) >Fiend: Not yet. First, let me have some fun with them. CROW: That's a porn trigger if I ever saw one. MIKE: This story just shot itself in the foot. >(Catsy looks at Rubeus, who nods in response. She backs off.) >Rubeus: Okay. That seems like a fitting reward. >Fiend: Thank you. (Rubeus and Catsy vanish as he wields his staff.) >Full Moon Magic. Make me a cat-o-9-tails! (He tosses the staff into >the air, which transforms into said weapon. He catches it and holds >it high. Suddenly the tails extend and wrap themselves around the >Sailor Senshi.) Teleport! (Full-Moon Fiend and the girls vanish. >At this time, fade out to the pink screen with moons and stars.) TOM: Yes, friends, just another happy ending. Tune in next time on "Attack of the Full-Moon Fiend" as the Fiend does... well, we don't know what... to the Sailors! ><<<<>>>> > >CLOSING NOTES: This has been an original story from my own mind. I >hope that you have enjoyed it thus far. I am a frequenter of >AnimeMUCK, and I go by the name of Bowser_DaHound there. I also enjoy >RanmaMUCK, but I don't have a name there as of >yet. If there are any developments MIKE: No, Crow. CROW: What? >before I finish Part 3, I'll >convey them to you in Part 3's Closing Notes. Speaking of Part 3, I >will warn you ahead of time that its content will >be nowhere near as tame as the content of this part. If you think you >can handle it, then be my guest, just TAKE HEED! Plus, and this is a >radical jump from topic to topic, I've heard tell that there are MUCKs >and MUSHs beyond those mentioned above. If anybody can convey to me >directions on how to reach these sites, I'll be giving instructions on >how to reach me after Part 3. So, until then, sayonara, you hentai, >you! >d;;-) TOM: Well, I can't say that paragraph made any linear sense, but at least it was short... MIKE: Let's go, guys. We wouldn't want Dr. Forrester to get the jump on us. (They exit the theater as the fanfic falls into Hentai-Space.) -- Disclaimers: "Sailor Moon," its characters, and all indicia thereof are copyright 1992-97 Takeuchi Naoko, Kodansha Ltd., and others. The English Adaptation thereof is copyright DIC Communications. "Mystery Science Theater 3000," its characters, and all indicia thereof are copyright 1988-1998 Best Brains, Inc. This MSTing was created by John Alan Riggs (better known as Alan or I.N.T.O.) on October 5, 1998. This MSTing has been archived at . E-mail me at , and I may give permission to archive it elsewhere.