--Alan -- What's behind door #4? A fight scene! ################################################ MST: The Cry for Help, chapter 4 Nega-Hell 18.2 Original by LaBeck Treatment by Alan ################################################ "Hello everybody!" shouted Jadeite as he walked into the darkened throne room. The card table stood on its side. The three other generals, crouched behind it, replied, "Hi, Doctor Jadeite!" "My latest scheme... er, upcoming achievement," he continued, stammering, "will be the forty-minute MSTing! Yes, folks, we're going to see if we can make up for time lost by doing this in forty minutes." The generals applauded without enthusiasm. "Yes. Thank you, thank you," Jadeite said, "I need all the attention I can get." The others walked out from behind the table. As they did, the lights went on. Malachite, standing tall, pointed to the theater door and said, "Let us run to the battlefield!" "I'm so embarrassed," Nephlite muttered. Zoisite, being confused, didn't say anything. She just opened the door and went in. -- The world's strongest door sequence: #6: A shower of ice crystals. #5: An elevator door, opening to nothing but blackness. #4: A prison gate, barred by thick chains. Falls apart. #3: A waterfall. The camera pans outwards. #2: A television screen, which sizzles and explodes. #1: A highway leading down to HELL! -- [The four enter the small theater. The seating order is the same, yesterday, today, and through eternity. From left to right: Jadeite, Malachite, Nephlite, and Zoisite.] > Live Stats: 27,617 Stories, 8,187 Authors, 334 >Categories, 866 Links MALACHITE: Do we have a reason WHY any of this exists? ZOISITE: Give a reason for life, authors. > Home » JustIn | Forum | Directory | Chat | >Links | BannerXchange | Help Desk >Black List JADEITE: Senator McCarthy opposes *red* Gundams. MALACHITE: I wonder what he'd say to EVA-02. > >Browse Categories TitleSummaryAuthor >FlavorTangerineKiwiBlueberryGrapeLime NEPHLITE: --and a bunch of other Saber Marionette J characters. >StrawberryBlackberryMint >FrenchGermanItalianPortugueseSpanish > > > JADEITE: This space was brought to you by the letter G. Use "G" whenever you need a letter! >A Cry For Help part 4 >Category: Anime » Dragon Ball Z Censor: PG13 >Reviews: 8 Download Story: 4KB >Author: LaBeck ZOISITE: I'd like to visit his *guitar shop*... > >"FINAL FLASH ATTACK!" Vegeta threw his arms forward, NEPHLITE: Well, at least the fic knows how to use an in-media-res opening. MALACHITE: It's just as good as "The Odyssey." >blue energy leapt from his hands towards Evil Wufei's >Gundam. He flew towards Wufei's Gundam, then teleported >behind it, kicking it into his blast. JADEITE: Cheap shot, but awfully useful. NEPHLITE: Why don't they use it in the anime? > >"Damn you!" Evil Wufei rubbed his aching head, but his >Gundam, however, wasn't even scratched. ZOISITE: Thanks to GUNDANIUM! >Vegeta cursed silently. Suddenly, a young teen flew >beside him. He had purple bobbed hair, he had icy blue >eyes. MALACHITE: That wouldn't be "Weasel Girl" Misao, would it? [Zoisite groans.] NEPHLITE: If anyone can identify the connection between Misao and "ice blue eyes," let us know. >He wore a small blue jacket with "Capsule Corporation" >inprinted on the side. He took his sword from >its holder. JADEITE: Isn't that theft? > >"Trunks!" Vegeta was surprised. > >Trunks began to power up, MALACHITE: [Trunks] Give me sight beyond sight! >his hair began to stand up, turning blonde. His eyes >turned green. His muscles grew so rapidly that it >completely destroyed his blue jacket, ZOISITE: They waste more money that way. NEPHLITE: I'd hate to accidentally go SSJ. >revealing his black tank top beneath. He flew at Evil >Wufei's Gundam, his sword raised. JADEITE: Whose sword? ZOISITE: Ummm... I think we're going below the belt here. > >"So, you want a sword fight? Heh," Wufei's Gundam >took out its light sabor, ready to strike. MALACHITE: [Wufei] Play ball! > >"Ahhhhhhhh!" Trunks screamed as a yellow aura >surrounded him. Wufei's Gundam swung its light sabor >at Trunks, who blocked it with his sword. JADEITE: Either Trunks is Gundam-sized, or else he's super-powerful. [Zoisite starts chanting the Escaflowne theme.] > >Trunks slashed at Wufei's Gundam, who counter-blocked >it with his light sabor. Trunks teleported behind >Wufei's Gundam, swinging his sword at Wufei's Gundam's >back. It struck, but it didn't leave even a scratch. ZOISITE: Thanks to [beat] Gundanium. MALACHITE: Yes, they have good defense. Can we move on? > >"Damn!" Trunks teleported away from Wufei's beam >sabor, which cut through a tree. JADEITE: Hey, stop hitting the joshua trees! MALACHITE: Where the Gundams have no name... > >"He's hurt badly," Goku looked at Heero's bleeding >leg. Heero whinced. Goku smiled and reached into a >bag tied to his belt, NEPHLITE: He stole Akira's bag! JADEITE: Goku is dead, baby, dead... ZOISITE: I wonder if Akira still had that map of Abyssinia. >taking out a small bean-like object, he handed it to >Heero. JADEITE: Beans, beans, the musical fruit... MALACHITE: No wonder Saiyans are so temperamental. > >"Eat this," Goku ordered, "It'll restore you're >vitality." > >Heero took the bean and stared at it. ZOISITE: [Heero] "Hit points +40"? What the hell? > >"It's a senzu bean, eat it and it'll heal your >injury." NEPHLITE: [zany] Lali want a sip? > >Heero ate it quickly, flinching when he felt a >tingling sensation in his leg. He looked down and >gasped as his wound began to close, the pain fading. MALACHITE: And here I thought he lived for pain. ZOISITE: [Heero] Damn. Now I can't write death-metal lyrics any more. >The wound closed without leaving a scar. Heero touched >it gently, his eyes filled with amazement. > >"Hurry up and get to your Gundam!" Goku yelled NEPHLITE: [Goku] I'm so embarrassed. >as he flew off towards the battle. Heero climbed to >his feet and ran to his Gundam. He climbed up the legs >and entered the cockpit. JADEITE: Did you fill it with gas? MALACHITE: [Heero] I knew I shouldn't have bought gas in the Chicago area. > >"Let's go, Wing Gundam," Heero said as his Gundam >rose, flying off to the battlefield. ZOISITE: With a little more enthusiasm, he could be Akito Tenkawa. > >"Take some of this!" Duo's Gundam slashed at Evil >Duo's Gundam, tearing its arm off. "Ha! I guess your >Deathscyth isn't as fast and strong as mine!" MALACHITE: [Evil Duo] It's just a flesh wound. >Duo laughed and slashed at Evil Deathscyth, which >counter-attacked Duo's strike with its own beam sabor. JADEITE: Duo versus Evil Duo. In a fair fight, who would win? MALACHITE: It depends which one gets to appear in real scenes. > >"KamehameHA!" Goku released his kamehameha JADEITE: As the name suggests... >at Evil Trowa's Gundam. Vegeta threw a ki blast at the >head of his Gundam, causing a great explosion. Trunks >raised both of his arms, gathering energy. NEPHLITE: --thereby causing blackouts all across the city. >"Take this!" Trunks threw the blast at Trowa's Gundam, >which was already enveloped in smoke and fire. ZOISITE: So what if your envelope is made of smoke and fire? The postage is still 33 cents U.S. > >Trunks gasped for air. The dust settled, revealing >Evil Trowa's Gundam. It was scratched, but other than >that, it was still in one piece. JADEITE: At least a scratch makes for an improvement. > >"Unbelievable!" Vegeta cried. NEPHLITE: [Vegeta] I disbelieve! > >"Vegeta, we have to fuse!" Goku yelled. > >"No, I'd rather die at your hand than fuse with you, >Kakkaroto!" MALACHITE: I'll stop the world and melt with you... > >"Vegeta, it's our only chance!" Goku yelled. > >"What? Quatre's been killed?" Evil Duo demanded. JADEITE: --in a different, unrelated scene. ZOISITE: Who's fighting who now? > >"Yeah, Duo killed him," Evil Trowa said, "Hurry up >and destroy him, get him out of the way!" NEPHLITE: [Dilandau] BURN!! > >"Excuse me buddies," Evil Heero laughed, "I have some >unfinished business I need to take care of." JADEITE: Bathroom break. ZOISITE: Maybe it's his tax returns. >He flew off. > >"Come on, show me what you got!" Duo yelled, MALACHITE: [singing] Lovely lady, show 'em what you've got... >slashing at the evil Deatscythe with his beam sabor. > >Meanwhile... ZOISITE: In the not-too-distant future... > >"Heero, I hope you're okay," Relena whispered, looking >out the window. NEPHLITE: [Relena] I wonder if Serena and Luna survived the fall? >She turned as the door opened, a figure stepped in. It >was Heero. [All boo and hiss at him.] > >"Heero, you're okay! What happened?" Relena gasped as >Heero grabbed her wrist, she gasped in pain. JADEITE: *Deep hurting!* MALACHITE: Mind you, Relena has sadistic tendencies. > >"You're coming with me," he smiled, dragging a >screaming Relena off. ZOISITE: Hey, that's not Relena, that's Kotori. MALACHITE: She's going mad! Mad! > >"What are you doing?!" Relena cried. Heero looked at >her, his eyes ALL: --impassive. >were cold as ice. JADEITE: Oh. ZOISITE: Or maybe that's Ashram. > >"You aren't Heero..." she whispered. > >He laughed NEPHLITE: How typical. >as he dropped a note on the bed where Relena was >earlier. > >TO BE CONTINUED.... MALACHITE: More cliches to follow! ZOISITE: Now, dear. This story wasn't *that* bad. > >NEXT: The last part, stay tuned for it!! NEPHLITE: Can Bandai work out a deal? Stay tuned! > >Review Story >Title: A Cry For Help part 4 >Censor: PG13 >Name: >Email: (optional) >Review: > > > > JADEITE: There is NO review! Only blank space! >Home | About Us | Awards | Nonprofit Status >| Disclaimer | Site Statistics > NEPHLITE: We're out of time. Gotta go! MALACHITE: Thanks for waiting. [They leave.] -- SOON, I'LL ACTUALLY DO Cry for Help chapter 5-6. -Alan June 8, 2000 e-mail: ChrOtaku@xoommail.com Nega-Hell: fanficoutlet.tripod.com/negahell Elfquest spoofs: eq_addiction.tripod.com (updated!) "Sailor Moon," and everything associated with it, is copyright 1992-2000 Naoko Takeuchi, Bandai, Kodansha Comics, DiC, Buena Vista, Mixx, Pioneer, and others. "Gundam Wing" is copyright 1999-2000 Bandai, Sunrise, Sotsu Agency, and TV Asahi. The idea of "Mystery Science Theater 3000" is copyright 1989-99 Best Brains, Inc. Feel free to distribute this fanfic/MSTing, but please don't remove my name from it, and don't try to make money off it. For a guide to romanizations of Gundam Wing names, see http://www.gundamwing.org/faq/spelling.html Stinger: >