Raye - Age 14 - Otaku


A silly spamfic
"I'm an otaku, and I'm OK..." Raye quietly sang to herself as she settled into her favorite chair. After waiting several seconds for the VCR to cue up the tape, she sighed when "The Wonder Years" was replaced by a far-more-pleasant blue screen. With her right hand, the erstwhile Sailor Mars dug into the bento that had been prepared for her consumption by an unknown source. "Ah, the final episode of Ranma 1/2," she said quietly, all the while extracting what appeared to be a piece of teriyaki chicken from the box, "If Ukyo doesn't go all the way this time, I may be forced to commit seppuku in front of my fellow fanboys." Raye sighed again, and thrust the bite of meat into her mouth...

And, Kami-sama damn it all, it was hot! The Sailor known for her fire attacks suddenly doubled over and began breathing flames. She managed to miss hitting the suddenly-endangered chair, and so all was well with the world once again. Moaning from the pain that still filled her throat, Raye hastily closed the lunch container and silently swore to return it to the dangerously kawaii girl who had given her the thing in the first place.

Returning her glazed eyes to the television screen, Raye caught a glance of a preview. "Curse you, Viz," she said, muttering angrily, "It's all your fault I got into Ranma 1/2, and now you want me to watch what? Maison Ikkoku? No, I'll stick with Maison Otaku, thank you very much." Mentally putting herself in hibernation, Raye manipulated her chi so that only the theme song would awaken her. She didn't especially like the tenth anniversary remix of "Wild Like You," but it would have to do.

Several minutes later, Raye sat up, for the show had begun. "Come on, Ucchan, we know you'll triumph," she quietly said - and just then, Ukyo appeared on the screen. Clad in her most vibrant chef's outfit, the Mistress of Okonomiyaki stepped forward, and right through the television screen. "What the hell?!" Raye shouted, leaping from her chair. With a reverent trembling in her voice, she asked, "Is there something wrong, Kuonji-sama?"

"Yes," Ukyo said somberly, drawing her Spatula of Death out from its holster, "Something bad enough to *require* a crossover. I can't quite say what it is yet, for that would critically lower our Recommended Vagueness Allowance. But I've heard some rumors, and some say that our evil comes with long, nasty fangs... or something like that." Ukyo sighed, and turned towards the bedroom door.

But then, Raye also sighed - loudly. "I've made a few self-insertion lemons starring you," the Sailor said, "And I'm not one to miss out on a chance to live out my fantasies." Smiling demurely, she removed her blouse.

Turning around, Ukyo appeared to be lost in thought. "How odd... and how sudden," the cook said abruptly, "But very well then. As long as it doesn't involve tentacles..."



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